Blessed.

Sometimes, I need to pause. Just pause and express how blessed I am. I'm so very blessed. My husband and I have stable jobs. We've had the same jobs since we graduated from college. I have my dream job teaching in an urban school. I get to live my dream every.single.day. Working with teenagers is hard work. It's made me a little goofier over the last 13 years, but I wouldn't change it for the world!

My biggest blessings are my husband and my son. They are so amazing. Let's face it. At times, I'm flat out nuts. Fertility meds make me rather insane. They both still love me. Thank goodness. I'm not sure how I could get through my days without them.

In a strange way, I'm blessed to have endo. I mean, if I could get rid of it or choose to live without it, I certainly would. However, I can tell you that it makes me more compassionate to others who are in pain. The little girl who, for two years, once a month, would curl up on the floor behind my desk at work, writhing in pain. Yeah. I got it. I talked to her mom. She didn't get it. But, I did. Because of me, that little girl knows YEARS earlier than I did that the amount of pain she is going through isn't normal and eventually, her mom took her to the doctor. Yeah. That was worth my pain because I hopefully saved her from years of pain and hopefully saved her fertility. That made me feel blessed.

Sometimes, it's the little things. Like, having food in my kitchen. I know, first hand, many children who go entire weekends without eating. Can you imagine? Me either. There is also that weekly gas tank fill up. Expensive. I have students who are late to school because their parent can't afford gas that week. That's the real world people. These things are happening right under our noses. In America.

I am so lucky to be blessed. I'm not more deserving. I don't have better luck. I'm not sure why I have been blessed. But, because I am, I just needed to show my gratitude for all of my blessings. Sure. I am having a terribly difficult time getting pregnant again. But, with all that I do have, I can hardly feel like life is unfair. My time is coming. Our baby is coming. But, in the meantime, I need to be more thankful for what I do have.

I hate country music, but love this song...

I would actually not just die for it, but be run over by a speeding semi. Or train. Or cut off all my fingers. Or toes. Definitely my second toe. It's freakishly long.

School cancelled already??

Fog. I guess it was awfully foggy this morning. Can't get those kiddos on a bus in fog. Bonus: I got to sleep in! I had plans to be productive today. If you consider shopping online and eating lunch productive, than it was a successful day! I needed a lazy day. The start of this school year has knocked me on my butt! My kids are great, my schedule is awesome, but I'm just flat out exhausted. My night usually consists of napping, eating dinner, going to bed. Now that Ayden has football practice, we throw that in there somewhere.

He is LOVING football, but one of his coaches is a jerk. These kids are in 3rd and 4th grade for goodness sakes. He yells at them like a mad man, even telling one kid that he was going to kick him so hard in his butt that his foot came out of his mouth...seriously? Not sure how we're going to handle this one. The hubs plans on going to the next few practices to watch this madman in action. He is also pretty good friends with the coordinator of the youth football program...so...he might accidentally let it slip. When they're older? Sure. Threaten to shove your foot up their butts. But, this young? He's asking to be attacked by crazy mothers now.

Then, get this: They sent most of the first year 4th graders down to the 3rd grade team. Seriously? Cutting/Dropping kids at this age? Come on! Luckily, Ayden stayed on the 4th grade team. If he would have gotten moved, he would have been ticked! All of his friends are on the 4th grade team. There are a ton of boys playing, but there has to be a better way. The coach sent a text to all of the parents with the names of the kids who were "cut" from the 4th grade team. Come on. What an idiot. I'm thinking he missed out on the empathy gene. Jerkface. This momma bear is on overprotective status now!

Today, my little boy started 4th grade! I can't even believe that he's already in the 4th grade! He looked so darn handsome this morning. So grown up. I tried to savor each and every single moment that he's been in my life. I thought it would make time slow down. It sure didn't. Life goes by so fast.

He said his teacher is funny, pretty, and smart. So, I asked him if it was just like hanging out with me all day...you can imagine his response.

So tired.

Last week was my first week back at school. I have been so.very.tired. As in, I nap for two hours and then go to bed. I forgot how tiring the beginning of the school year can be. So, other than school and sleeping, not much has been going on around here.

I did get my dress for my SIL's wedding. I'm her Matron of Honor. It's absolutely beautiful and I can't wait to wear it. The cowboy boots I'm supposed to wear with them? Well, I'm not sure about those. I've owned zero cowboy anything in my life. As far as I'm concerned, country music is like nails on a chalkboard. Maybe worse. I'm so excited for my SIL, but cowboy boots? Come on!

Chunky Chicken Broth

I am a picky about my chicken broth. Shortly after making the change to a whole food diet a couple of years ago, I learned how to make my own (which is stupid easy) and won't buy it ever again. So, with the Fall coming quickly and soup season upon us, I figured it was time to stock up on broth. While it's not difficult, it is time consuming. So, after making a whole chicken in a crockpot for dinner a couple of nights ago, I put all the chicken bones and other parts back in the crockpot, filled it to the top with water and set it on low overnight. It always smells like Thanksgiving in the morning. Yummy!

So, yesterday, I spent the day straining the broth and skimming the unwanted parts out of the broth. Again, not hard, just time consuming. This morning, I was ready to skim the fat off the top and I noticed a huge chunk of fat right under the surface. Odd. This had never happened before...so I gently scooped it out with my skimmer...to my horror, upon lifting the skimmer out of the broth, there was a tail. The object was heavy. So heavy. When did chickens get tails?  That's when I realized what was before me.

It wasn't a bone. As I squinted my eyes and looked closer, I felt a blood curdling scream rolling through my insides. Once the screaming began,  I couldn't get it to stop. Ayden was now concerned. It appeared to anyone not in the kitchen, that I'd cut a finger off or lost leg or was being attacked by a wild boar.

"A mouse!" I yelled through muddled words and tears. Oh. I can't even explain the horror. A mouse had committed suicide in my broth. I need to decontaminate my eyes so I can forget that horrible image!

No more or less confident than before

Our interview was yesterday and after having 24 hours to think about it, I think it went well. Our worker came with the CASA worker and we just sat around the table and laughed. The CASA worker asked us about our parenting style and why we wanted to adopt and that was about it. I think she just wanted to make sure we weren't complete nut jobs. There are three families that are being considered, including us, and we were the first interview. Hopefully, we left a lot to live up to!

Even though the interview went well, the lady was hard to read. She was so nice and easy to talk to, but she wasn't letting anything slip. Yes, we tried. Our worker bragged about how much she loved us, but in the end, she isn't the one making the decision. So, we won't have any idea about how things went until the end of October. Heaven help us keep it together until then.

This time next week, I'll be back at work, so I'll have something to keep me busy. Hopefully, that helps time pass faster. Between then and now, I'll be having a root canal. Nice. At my appointment yesterday, it was pretty obvious this is where I was headed. I can hardly wait. I hate the dentist.