My cd 3 appointment is over and we have the green light to go! I have "lots" of follicles waiting to get going and growing on each ovary. It only takes one! The nurse doing my u/s was extremely kind. She said that she loved it when there were lots of eggs waiting to release. She said, "When there are a lot like this, we can help! It's the women who don't have any waiting that we can't help as well. There just many meds to help with that." Then, she smiled. I haven't come across one person (nurse, doctor, etc) at this office that has ever been in a bad mood. Ever. I think they feed happy gas through the vents. Whatever. I am so pleased that we changed REs.
When we left the RE's office, I had a message on my phone from the pharmacy. They had our grand total that we owed for the meds this month. I took a deep breath and called them back: $750. Sweet heavens. I know. It could be worse. But, that was a shocker. Our December cycle was only $450. When I questioned the pharmacy about why there was a huge difference from December, they told me that the doc's office ordered a 600 Follistim pen this month and a 300 pen in December. I only need a 300 pen for this cycle and I had a refill from December. So, I overrode the docs office and just ordered my refill on the 300 pen and my 2 Ovidrel injections. I hope that doesn't back fire and I actually end up needing the extra Follistim. Not sure what I'll do then. But, $450 vs. $750...the money spoke to me. What can I say? But, this cycle is going to work, so I didn't want to have a lot left over :)
I am going to start listening to this positive imagery thing I have on my ipod, too. Our RE recommended it and he said there are studies showing quite a large increase in pregnancy rates when positive imagery is paired with fertility treatments. I started listening in December, but when we cancelled the iui, I quit listening. I was putting my ear buds in and listening to it as soon as I went to bed. It was super relaxing. Sometimes, I even fell asleep. Then, the stupid ipod would advance to the next song and I'd jump through the ceiling. Maybe I'll need a new plan this month. I'm not fond of being scared awake!
Sometimes, I think I need to just let my body and God do their work. I need to quit micro-managing every aspect of my life. Maybe, I didn't have a February cycle because my body knew it wasn't healed enough from surgery to carry a pregnancy. Before surgery, maybe my body (and heart) wouldn't let a pregnancy happen because of the septum in my uterus. It just knew that I couldn't go through another m/c. That was my biggest fear. I can honestly say that after surgery, that fear is gone. I'm ready, in both my mind, heart, and body to carry a healthy pregnancy.
So, here's what I'm doing today, cd 3: Famara, 5mg and the positive imagery thingy. Oh. And, I ate a Cinnabon. I'm pretty sure those have some kind of fertility assistance in them! They're too heavenly not to :)
Letter to Our Baby-To-Be (BTB):
I cannot even begin to tell you how excited we are for you to come into our family. We have talked about what it will be like to have you here and what we'll name you. Your big brother talks about having you here all the time. You are so loved already.
By the time we see your sweet face, we will have been waiting nine years to meet you. Nine years. We'd do every bit of these last nine years again if it means we'll get to bring you home and love on you. Our entire family has been praying for us over these last few years and I think all of our prayers are about to be answered.
So, don't be shy. Get ready to burrow in and enjoy the nine month ride!
Love you already,