Sometimes, we forget.

Good thing, because often, we feel so alone in this world of IF. I am strong. Usually. But, lately, I feel like I'm not as strong as I need to be. Discouraged, yep. I've been there lately. After having this weekend to think about where I am with my IF journey, I've realized that it's a good thing AF didn't show up right away. I would have made rushed decisions to start again before I know I should. It helps that we need to stock pile our bank account again! So, I'll spend this next month, finding my strength to carry on and growing my own faith that God really does have a plan. I'm a planner. I'm a control freak. Maybe that's my lesson in all of this. Just.let.go. Don't.be.afraid. I.am.not.alone. God has me waiting because what he has in store for me is so much better than I could have ever planned for myself. I just know it is. Note to self: Mandy, Just.Let.Go!

Yes, I have another quote, which I found on a PTSD website. But, not only does it apply to people with PTSD, but IF peeps, too. No matter what, by the time our next baby is here, my 'baby' will be 11...I will have endured a decade with many bad days. But, I've made it through each day. I'm still here. I'm still fighting. God forgot to put the "give up" gene in my DNA.

 

 

And, because I love this man, I thought I'd include a picture from our mini-vacation last year. We were visiting one of the hubs' battle buddies from when he was in Iraq. We stayed at a hotel that had great reviews online and amazing pictures...never believe what you read online. Ever. There were beer bottles in the bushes by the "family friendly" pool and our first room looked it had just been involved in a murder scene. Our gut instinct was to go to another hotel, but we were tired. They moved us to a better room, but I never slept well after seeing that first room...can you say CSI?! We went to a zoo we'd never visited, ate at super yummy resturants, and went to an amazing aquarium. The pictures from that trip are some of my favorite family pictures. We were relaxed and smiley. A lot. With IF and PTSD, that doesn't happen often. So, we cherish those moments!

 

 

So, to all of you out there reading this, whether your particularly religious or not, in our worst moments, let's all remember, we are not alone. There is a plan. It would be much more relaxing and reassuring if we knew what it was, but that would be like ruining a surprise party, right? Oh, that's right, I hate surprises. This will be challenging!